Creative Art Installations for the Gay Men’s community, 1983–2013
1983–2006:
Designing Interiors—
Light and Comfort to Combat AIDS and the Winter’s Darkness
In 1983 I was freaking out… As AIDS was enveloping my social world, one of my dying friends enlisted me to drive him to the gathering of a newly formed rural network of gay men named The Billy Club. We drove into the mountains to have the first of many gatherings over New Year’s. We met at a healing school named Heartwood, which was closed for the holiday.
There, battered by winter storms interrupted by occasional sun, we laid down the sick and, Using the talent and knowledge among ourselves, we formed community. Shamans and Radical Fairies, political activists, carpenters, artists, gardeners, dancers, and lawyers all joined in.
I found my place by arriving early with the set up crew to help decorate. I started by making signs and hanging banners, and later went on to create fanciful stages by painting and sculpting with fabrics and cardboard. “Snack and Snuggle” lounges came next, incorporating Indian fabrics, colored lights, and fabric “chandeliers” to design atmospheres for song and dance, rest and relaxation. I competed with myself, trying each year to outdo the previous one.
At the center of our gathering was the Heart Circle, where we sat in a circle - sometimes a hundred men or more. We spoke of our heart’s need to be heard in the sealed container of that circle. A huge outpouring of emotion would be held, often physically, especially in those early days where Circle would last all day with breaks for meals.
There also was a New Year Ritual that took on many forms… from singing the Blue Danube Waltz while dancing around a bonfire under the blue moon, to being reborn while being held and passed through a tunnel made of everyone's clasped arms—a living, sweating birth canal. We needed to let it all go, shake it out to say goodbye, call out the names of the dead, and be reborn.
Ritual and play, silence and singing, a “talent/no talent” show, drag, a dance, and a striptease version of musical chairs called “naughty pillows”
In 2006, I was diagnosed with having Parkinson’s Disease (PD)
2010–2013:
Saratoga Springs 4th of July Gatherings—
Creating Cooling Oases for Contemplation under the Trees
I rejoined the Billys after a short hiatus to take a deep dive into meditation practice and what it meant to have PD. Whereas Heartwood was an Eagles aerie of buildings strung out along a windswept mountain ridge, Saratoga Springs, shaded by magnificent native oaks, was a south facing valley that could reach over 100 degrees in summer.
With the two lodges in full use for dining, talent shows, art shows, and Heart Circles, what was needed was an additional shaded inside/outside room to gather.
After a friend's creation of an elaborate Tea lounge the previous year, I was inspired to create a new pavilion for multiple uses in a grove of trees. As at Heartwood, with each succeeding structure was more elaborate. I did so for four years, until Parkinson’s stopped me.
As each year the room was created from the materials at hand, I had to sketch out, pre-visualize what I was going to do, mocking up critical components to make sure they would work. I then made a list of what I needed to bring, buy, or borrow. Parachutes, rope, tarps, electrical cords, rugs, pillows, a water tank, fans, pumps, foliage, bells, bamboo, wire, various lights (including one to go underwater), fabrics, duct tape, a ceramic urn, and a Balinese fountain figure, were some of the things needed.
Everyone was supportive of my process, so I was able to create in public, something I was very sensitive in doing. Volunteers were always signing up to help. One close friend in particular was always at my side—as engineer, fixer, ladder climber, and problem solver for my artist-mind.
Pavilion 1: Simple fountain with pond, plants, and Balinese fountain.
Pavilion 2: Chandelier over fountain with fighting Queens painting (a backdrop from an earlier play).
Pavilion 3: Tree stump fountain with lanterns in one room and revolving chandelier in a second room. Flower panel paintings (which I originally created for a dance performance about Parkinson’s) as screens.
Pavilion 4: Moroccan tent with Quan Yin fountain urn with fans, bells, fabric hangings, and a Green Man painting.
These creations were my gifts back to the community which had supported me emotionally and spiritually. The community later assisted me with scholarships—even passing the hat—as I struggled with becoming more and more disabled.
I am forever grateful to my friends, the Billys. And I am thankful to my friend Will - who, while dying, introduced me in 1983 to the emerging community that became the Billys in the oncoming darkness that was the AIDS crisis.
Parkinson’s, and my deepening immersion in Buddhist meditation retreats and practice, has gradually changed the focus of my community needs. In my heart I will always be a Billy.